she said "if he doesn't make you happy, let go." it sounded so simple, such a simple solution to this, but it really isn't. because I. DON'T. WANT. TO. HURT. HIM.

i know i'm the girl, so she thinks it's all up to me to decide, and it's all up to him to please me so that i'll favor him. yes, because that's how it works when it comes to her. she's happy that way. and i don't blame her. blame sexist culture. blame the patriarchal system. blame the "dalagang filipina" notion they put in our heads from the time we were born. blame everyone else. blame everyone else but us.